Okay Mom, here’s some tunes for you, to say HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY! (more…)
Archive for the ‘Parenting my boy’ Category
I spent the last few summers of my teens hanging out with Chief Advisor in a crappy little apartment in the only cool part of Edmonton, Alberta. I didn’t really know he was Chief Advisor yet; he was pretty much just my dad, and those were sad times for him. I think he wasn’t quite sure yet that the divorce had been the right thing to do. He hadn’t met his now-wife, and he probably hadn’t come to terms with the “it takes two” aspect of packing it in on a marriage – i.e. I think he blamed himself in those days. We went to figure-drawing classes together, hung out with his artist friends, and counted down the days before the Edmonton Folk Music Festival, at which he’d got me a pretty awesome gig on the Backstage security crew. And that’s where I had my first girl-crush … not backstage, but at the Folk Fest. It wasn’t an “I want to be with you” sort of crush, but more of an “I want to BE you” one. These two gals were exactly my age, but they seemed light-years ahead of me in terms of confidence, personal style, and adolescent success. They were creative, self-assured, had had real boyfriends, and they played Rugby.
When I was a little kid, I remember thinking everything was always under control. I guess this is a good sign – the fact that I don’t remember feeling anxious or surrounded by chaos. These days I’m trying to create the same security, comfort and routine for my son – and guess what? All that “under control” business is a façade! I think about the early days with my mom’s in-home day care, my mother-in-law with her three kids (including two VERY active little boys like my one), and about my Auntie Elle – a high-powered professional – then raising four children. How did they manage at all, let alone, with grace?